Missing children, lost civility

As the details of little Cecilia Zhang’s abduction in Toronto hit the national headlines, every parent’s worst nightmare was revisited. This innocent child was in her own bed, in her home with her loving, protective parents. She should have been safe. How could this happen in our community, our country? This case bears resemblance to two well-publicized American abductions. In March of 1932, 21-month-old Charles Lindbergh Jr. was snatched from his bed in New Jersey. He was the only child of wealthy and famous parents. His captor left a ransom note demanding $50,000 and over the following weeks the sum grew higher. Two months later the body of the baby was discovered not far from his home, the cause of death a head injury suspected to have occurred the night of the kidnapping. In June of 2002 in Utah, 14-year-old Elizabeth Smart was taken from her home at knifepoint by religious zealots who had come in contact with the family as casual labourers. Nine months later, she was found in a suburb of her own city, wandering the streets with two adult companions. She had been sexually assaulted and made to live as a concubine for the couple that had abducted her. Closer to home, there have been other less similar but equally haunting cases. The names of these children are forever etched in our memory; Sharin Morningstar Keenan of Toronto, Christine Jessop of Queensville, Alison Parrot of Toronto, Kristin French of St. Catharines, Leslie Mahaffey of Burlington, Jessica Koopmans of Lethbridge and Holly Jones of Toronto, to name a few. Some were abducted for money; some for religious reasons; and others were victims of sex crimes. Very few were found alive, though that is always the hope. As a parent, I want answers, how can I protect my children from this type of crime? The one qualifying similarity amongst the cases is that all are considered “stranger abductions,” in which the abductor is not the parent or stepparent of the child, but could be another relative, neighbour, friend or acquaintance. Is this growing phenomenon a result of a culture of fear and suspicion? I was taught that it wasn’t safe to talk to strangers and I passed this lesson on to my children. I have noticed that people are uncomfortable if a stranger starts a conversation. Unless I am riding with a friend, I find elevators and buses strangely silent places. Even the sense of neighbourliness that I remember as a child no longer exists. I am pleasant to my neighbours, but we hardly speak. Everyone is suspect. I think this attitude is perpetuating the problem. There is an old proverb that says “It takes an entire village to raise a child.” and I think it could be expanded to say “and an entire village to protect one.” Teaching children to speak out when they feel threatened is an important task, but a more powerful deterrent to abduction is a watchful and involved community. Some community organizations have recognized the need for this kind of thinking with volunteer programs like “Neighbourhood Watch,” which encourages people to report any suspicious occurrences in their neighbourhoods in an effort to reduce crime. “Block Parent” is another organization that has arisen out of this need. Concerned citizens can register for a police check and, once accepted into the program, are given a sign that is placed in the window of their home or office. This sign tells children, seniors or anyone in need that this residence is a safe place to seek help. In Toronto, the police have pulled their support from the program, but it continues to thrive elsewhere across the country. As communities have grown and commuting is more common, the need to link communities has become a priority. One program causing controversy is the “AMBER Alert” system (an acronym for Americas Missing Broadcast Emergency Response) that originated in Texas and was named after the unsolved kidnapping and murder of young Amber Hagerman. When an AMBER alert is issued a special press release is sent to designated radio and television stations and broadcasting is interrupted or, in the case of television, a scroll appears on the bottom of the screen. These announcements also appear on electronic highway signs. As time is a priority in these situations the alert is given the same importance as other civil emergencies, like dangerous weather warnings. The AMBER alert was first introduced in regions of Ontario in 2001and is gradually gaining popularity across the country, but it has not been adopted in all provinces yet. The concern voiced by some is that AMBER warnings will arouse a feeling of vigilantism in a portion of the population and the general public will try to solve these crimes themselves. This is an exaggerated concern. If anything, Canadians suffer from an attitude of complacency about speaking out and I fear that this is far more dangerous to the future of our country. I hope that my fellow countrymen will not sit passively by and wait for the next person to do the right thing. When fear interferes with the ability to take reasonable action then people become victims. The opposite opinion is that AMBER warnings will become so commonplace that people will soon ignore their importance. This implies that people will lose interest because they do not feel connected to these children. The only way to feel connected is to make the choice to be a community. I think every individual needs to make a conscious decision to speak to her neighbour and to speak out against injustice or when things “just don’t feel right.” I challenge you to step out of your comfort zone for the sake of the child you once were. My heart goes out to all parents who have lost a child. I mourn the loss of their youth, vitality and the hope that they gave for the future. As communities grow it is important to expand the vision of neighbour to include all who live therein and then make the effort to be more connected with others. Remember, there is safety in numbers.

Image courtesy of stock.xchng.