The days of chanting ‘Girl Power’ at a Spice Girls concerts may be long gone, and most of the young women I know look at feminism as an unnecessary label in a world where we are pretty much equal. Why label myself as anything but what I am?
But are we equal in the dating world? We expect that our potential manfriend will do all the work, ask us out for the first time, foot the bill and call within three days. Really, ladies? Are we that out of touch with the modern world?
Pretending to be meek and timid is just as unsexy as playing dumb to attract a man. If you’re a strong and forward chick – be a strong and forward chick. You don’t have to be aggressive you don’t have to be the crazy girl who calls every hour. On. The. Hour. You can just be yourself.
Recently I decided to embrace being forward; because I’ve never been the quiet girl and pretending to be both patient and quiet are not things I’m interested in doing. I don’t want to wait and see if maybe he’ll ask me out. And to the people who wrote, He’s Just Not That into You. I say “Bite me.” The idea that he would have asked me out immediately if he wanted to is silly. Boys get nervous, too.
Besides, I enjoy being different, I enjoy being the ballsy girl and most of all I enjoy beating him to the punch. Don’t you?
Do you know what he’ll remember about the fact that you did the asking out? Not that you’re sad or desperate, as the rom-coms would have you believe. What he’s going to remember is that you are incredibly confident and that is as sexy a trait as you can possibly have.
We live in a world where we are taught that we can achieve anything so why not apply that same confidence to our relationships? Why do we play the meek little girl card? It’s anything but sexy. Actually it’s annoying and it makes the rest of us look bad.
So here’s the great part: when I decided to be ballsy, to say convention sucks and I like him so screw the rules, he said, “That sounds great.”
The sexy potential manfriend that I couldn’t stop staring at for an entire evening – the one who made me feel like a school girl, the one who’s million dollar smile could cure cancer – was not only turned on by my confidence but he was excited that I’d done the asking. And now we have a date.
Am I a feminist? No. I’ve never needed to be one. But do I support this Jessica Simpson-esque trend of women acting dumb to get a date? Not even a “kind of.”
Go out there and get what you want and if he’s not for you, he’s not for you, but ladies the game has changed and you’re holding aces; so put on your best come hither smile and rock his world with a little bit of gumption.
Image courtesy stock.xchng.
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