When I first started dating Mr. Unexpected I told him flat out that he wouldn’t be meeting my mother because I do not introduce the boys I date to my mom, ever.
But after I met his parents my mom was pretty strict about the fact that she would be meeting Mr. Unexpected; and to be honest, for the first time ever I actually wanted her to meet a boyfriend.
I’ve always joked, in a self-deprecating and not entirely healthy way, that I was the girl you take home, not the girl you take home to mom. The relationships I’ve had over the past couple of years have been full of lust but never love, not really. And I hated the idea of introducing my mom to someone temporary because she isn’t temporary: she’s my favourite person in the world. You don’t introduce someone temporary to your favourite person.
So two days after I get back from Austin next week I’ll be sitting down to dinner with my mom, her lovely husband and my boyfriend. It’s kind of a big moment for me. I’m not sure I’m the marrying kind, I’m not interested in gushing over babies and I am terrible at sharing feelings; but this thing I’m doing, acknowledging that I’m with someone to my mom, this is something I can do.
There aren’t any Facebook milestones for people like me. I don’t have a relationship status and I’m not getting engaged any time soon, I’m just trying to accept intimacy into my life and they don’t give you a badge for being somewhat normal.
When I told Mr. Unexpected that my mom was coming to visit and that we’d all be going to dinner he said, “I knew I’d break you.” He knows me better than I do myself sometimes and he knew eventually that I’d come around. He knew that when I felt ready for the parental thing I would ask.
On top of meeting my mom Mr. Unexpected and I have plans to go away for a weekend and to spend Easter weekend with his family. I have to admit I kind of love the intimacy we have, even if that means embracing family dinners outside of the city and being introduced to family and friends as ‘the girlfriend.’
I couldn’t have guessed that we’d be here now. Going back I think about how all of this started at a chance meeting in a TIFF movie lineup when a friend brought me along because I was bored; I think about how in October I wasn’t even sure if he wanted to make it official; and finally I think about how in the past five months I’ve become a better person because of him.
I couldn’t have predicted any of this would happen but I’m happy and all those dark and twisty feelings are starting to fade away because when he’s around I can’t help but smile and laugh.