By Melissa Ramos aka Sexy Food Therapy

Certain things I find terrifying: the Boogeyman who hid underneath my bed, Bloody Mary who’s name I would never say three times, and Casper the ghost (I know he’s supposed to be friendly, but he’d chase me in my dreams).  However, there is another monster that’s far scarier…the Dress Monster.

She taunts you on the wrack with her clean lines and gorgeous colour and soon you find yourself in the change room, throwing her over your head. You tug on her to get deeper but then realize…you’re stuck. You huff and you puff and blow all your air out so that it’ll fit.  Your face becomes red from overexertion and you stop, look in the mirror to realize…the Dress Monster got you.  Stuck at the breast line, you begin to contemplate your escape.

Should I call the sales girl? I can’t. I’ve gone commando today.

Do I try to pull the dress off versus trying to fit into it? It’s no use; it’s stuck underneath my armpits.

Luckily, when the Dress Monster came to pay me a visit one fateful day, I was with The Gentleman, who after hearing me banging into walls, offered to help and luckily I was saved.

Thankfully, I still managed to find an outfit for an upcoming fashion show and also learned an important lesson.  Eat more greens and I couldn’t get home fast enough to make one mega killer salad.


½ bunch kale

½ beet shredded

1 carrot shredded

1 bulb roasted garlic roughly chopped

Handful mixed nuts: pecans, walnuts, sunflower seeds – pan roasted for 5mins on low

2 tbsp hemp hearts

1 tbsp olive oil


1 heaping tbsp tahini paste

½ lemon squeezed

1 tbsp umeboshi vinegar

1 tbsp honey (or more to taste)

Bunch up kale and slice thin.  Add this to a pan with heated oil on medium heat.  Cook kale until bright green – about 5 minutes. Remove from heat and top with shredded beet, carrot and cabbage. Add roasted garlic, mixed nuts and hemp hearts.  Set aside.

Combine all ingredients for dressing and stir until well combined. Top on salad and serve.

Serves 2

Sometimes I fall off the bandwagon and forget the importance of greens for energy, stress and reaching my ideal healthy weight. More reason to shape up.  With my new found strength, I was fearless and empowered.

While I’m no longer 20, I’m 32 and my curves are fuller and sometimes they get stuck – but that’s okay.  Instead of living out of a box and running from our bodies that we’ve grown to not accept and even loathe, let’s reconnect through real, whole, sexy foods where the process of self love, true protection and fearlessness is inevitable.


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