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Australian MP proposes to partner on House floor

Be prepared to tear up!

As Australia’s Parliament debated a bill that would legalize same sex marriage, conservative MP Tim Wilson proposed to his partner on the House floor.

“”In my first speech I defined our bond by the ring that sits on both of our left hands, and they are the answer to a question we cannot ask. There’s only one thing left to do: Ryan Patrick Bolger, will you marry me?”

His partner, a primary school teacher, sat in the public gallery and mouthed the word “yes” to the applause of other members of the House. He was grinning from ear to ear while Wilson, still trying to remain professional on the floor, tried to keep it together, albeit unsuccessfully. The proposal was recorded in the official parliamentary record.

“I should let Hansard note to record that that was a ‘yes’ — a resounding yes,” said the deputy speaker. “Congratulations.”

Wilson and Bolger have been partners for a long time, but did not want to get officially engaged until it was legal for them to get married. Wilson was one of the first lawmakers to support the bill to legalize same-sex marriage.

The bill is expected to pass based on a non-binary referendum took place in which 61.6 per cent of respondents voted to approve the legislation by Christmas. However, the Senate is fighting to include amendments to the bill that would allow those affiliated with the church, including wedding celebrants, to refuse to officiate same-sex marriages.

Surprisingly, the Australian Prime Minister is supporting these amendments under the coin of religious freedom If the amendments aren’t approved, the bill could be delayed further.

Same-sex marriage was banned in Australia in 2004 when the Marriage Act was amended to define the union as being between a man and a woman. The government has received a lot of pressure to change the Act, especially after Ireland voted to legalize same-sex marriage in 2015.

While couples throughout Australia wait to find out of they can finally marry the people they love, lets take the time to congratulate Wilson and Bolger on their engagement! And for making history as the first person ever to propose on Australia’s Parliament floor!

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle set to marry next May

As news broke early yesterday morning of Prince Harry’s royal engagement to American actress, Meghan Markle, hearts of girls around the world broke as they realized they had minuscule hope of becoming the next princess. Personally, I was rooting for Prince Harry and Meghan since the media started speculating about their relationship in 2015.

The two have been dating for a year and a half and it was announced Tuesday morning they are set to marry next May at St George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle. The two are reportedly planning the ceremony themselves. Prince Harry has always been the more ‘bad-boy royal’ so to say, especially compared to his older brother, Prince William. Harry was known for his bachelor’s lifestyle, dating a string of beautiful women when he was younger and often getting in trouble with the press.

Eventually, Prince Harry matured and paid keen attention to his charitable work, including the support of 22 different charities and over 25 different causes worldwide. Before settling down with Meghan Markle, the prince’s long time on and off girlfriend of seven years was Chelsy Davy. Davy reportedly ended their relationship after she allegedly struggled with the pressure of dating a royal. Davy was last seen publically with Harry as she attended Prince William’s wedding to Kate Middleton back in 2011.

It has been reported by Harry and Meghan that the pair met through a female friend that set them up on a blind date. In fact, Harry claims to have never seen Markle on her most known television role in the show, Suits, before meeting. The two sat down for an intimate interview with a BBC reporter shortly after announcing to the public their official engagement. They giggled behind the scenes and acted very much like a couple that’s down to earth and in love. As Prince Harry remarked in the interview, Meghan Markle was ‘the one” from the very first time they met.

It sounds like the story of fairy-tales. Markle remarked that she excitedly replied yes to Harry’s proposal before he could even put the ring on her finger, as they spent a cozy evening at home roasting chicken. I am beyond thrilled for this next royal couple and considering these two have a lot in common, including their love for charity, it is hopeful they can live a relatively normal life, at least as normal as it can get for for such a well-known member of the Royal Family.

The British family has changed quite a lot over the years, but Prince Harry and Meghan Markle ignored any negative feedback from the public. As Harry is fifth in line to the crown, it doesn’t seem there is any rush for him to conform to the pressure of being a ‘King’, while living in such a modern society. Markle, who is a divorced, American actress, will now allegedly become HRH Duchess of Sussex, or as she will be in our hearts: Princess Meghan, the one that stole Harry’s heart.

Congratulations to this happy and beautiful couple.

Should I be jealous my husband watches porn?

Whether it’s behind your back, leaving a trail of computer history behind, or right next to you, he’s watching porn. Some women hate it; others don’t care. If your man’s porn fixations are getting under your skin, it’s time to face your feelings head on. Perhaps you’re burdened with questions buzzing in your brain, or worse, a closet full of insecurities bred from feeling upstaged by his favourite pornstar. Despite all this, you hide your jealousy because you don’t want to play porn police and rain on his boobie parade. Fortunately, you don’t have to feel this way.

Read through this question-answer guide to gain some clarity on your husband’s porn dependence.

Is it cheating?

The question of whether porn counts as cheating can be a confusing debate. The answer really depends on your personal definition of cheating. For some, cheating could be as simple as a small crush on a friend or co-worker, while for others, it’s being sexual or emotionally intimate with someone else. So, let’s say cheating can be understood as the latter, then no, watching porn is not cheating—unless he’s fallen in love with the porn star. Eek!

In simple terms, porn allows people to fantasize about spectacles that are not normally attainable in real life. Is this necessarily bad? Well, think about it this way: what’s the root cause of your jealousy? Is it the fact that his eyes and juices are shooting elsewhere or that it’s being directed at another woman? According to sex therapist Alina Palin, “most men do not necessarily watch porn for the women. Rather, the excitement comes from the super sexualized actions that the women are performing.”

Shane Panser, 31, agrees with this view. “When I watch porn, I don’t really care for what the girls look like. I just browse around for videos until I find one giving a crazy good BJ.”

Matt McMillen, a medical writer for Web MD, confirms this sentiment in his article, “Why Men Like Porn”, explaining that for most men, the reliance on porn is not grounded in a preference for another woman, but rather the rawness of the sex she’s performing. He says, “It’s not about what he’s not getting at home. It’s the novelty. It’s a turn-on.”

So, is porn cheating? All signs point to no.

What if it’s too hard core?

It’s common to worry about the type of porn your man watches and its level of intensity. Some types of porn can be pretty hard core, involving all the bells and whistles, from face-slapping degradation to frantic “juice” guzzling, topped with mascara running down the poor girl’s eyes. You get the picture. And all the while, the pornstar is loving it—so not realistic! Consider her size quadruple Z bust, big blonde hair and sky-high stilettos, a look that no regular grocery-running woman would ever wear. Clearly, it’s all just make-believe.

Many women think that their man’s favourite porn is a representation of his sexual desires for his relationship. It’s not. These videos are not real life—it’s pretend, separate from his intimacy with you. There’s also a good reason why he might keep these two realms apart. In the porn world, it can be thrilling to watch a woman get battered up by three schlongs, as distasteful as that may sound to some. However, with you, he can disconnect and compartmentalize his porn cravings, and appreciate your unique sexual dynamic on its own.

It’s not necessarily about being better or worse—it’s just something different, like enjoying a different spice. As explained in the men’s sex guide, featured by Intimate Village, men use porn to supplement and vary their sexual urges. So, while most women hope that their men’s porn appetites remain safely along the lines of low-rez lesbians and homemade videos by couples, realistically, many men enjoy much fiercer exploits.

Am I less desirable?

The true allure of porn for a man is rarely a negative reflection on his partner, says sex therapist Lonnie Barbach, PhD, in practice in San Francisco. “Some women feel threatened because they don’t think they’re as sexy as a porn star,” she says.

Yet, as previously mentioned, the seduction of porn is set in the sexual performance, not the actress’ looks. She could be gorgeous or plain—either way, he’s usually not imagining himself with her on a personal level, but rather enjoying the possibility of experiencing that pleasure.

According to sex and relationship specialist Luke Gilkerson, it’s really just part of a guy’s nature to just look at naked women in general. In turn, women should not personalize this behaviour, which is instinctive, as long as it’s kept respectively controlled within the confines of porn and not with another woman.

If you still feel that your man’s fantasies are alienating you from his sex life, you can always join in on the action. Together, you can role play or experiment, supplementing the experience with twosome toys, as R.Esco suggests in her article, “The Health Benefits of Sex.” Whichever way you fire it up, the main goal is to streamline his porn fetishes to align with your sexuality in a healthy and agreeable manner.

 

Like any habit that needs curbing, your jealousy can be easily diffused with the right attitude toward porn. Accept your husband’s porn as something natural and inevitable, but most importantly, never see it as your competition.

Why does my husband fall asleep before me?

It baffles me and angers me at the same time. My husband and I are tucked in bed. He scrolls through his Facebook newsfeed as do I. After around 10 minutes, we turn our iPads off, kiss each other goodnight, and prepare to sleep.

That’s where it all changes. While I am still making mental notes about what I am going to wear in the morning, I hear a faint snore. It doesn’t even astonish me anymore, but I still turn around to check. Yup, peaceful as a baby; my husband is always asleep way before I am.

It’s like every night he tries to race me and humiliates me with the low hum of his snoring not even five minutes into the competition — and it’s not that I don’t try to beat him. I squeeze my eyes tightly shut and force my brain to just think “black.” I stay cocooned in one position and try to relax. Yes, I make a conscious effort. While I’m trying my darndest to enter slumberland, my husband is asleep!

How does he do it? Why can’t I do it?

When I asked him how he bags the zzzs so fast, he said, “It’s simple. I just think about cars, and I am in my happy place.”

I suppose I could try it. I’d probably be so bored that I wouldn’t even have to try to fall asleep.

Fact of the matter is that it makes no difference as to how hard I try; I just can’t switch my brain off. At some point during my active perusal of thinking “black” my mind subconsciously drifts towards what I will cook tomorrow. Then I think about and the catty comment my aunt’s nephew’s son posted on a picture I put up on Facebook and then I think of a million ways to respond to him. When I’m done, I imagine running into him on the street and mentally prepare the cool and calm encounter I’ll have with him. Of course I’ll exit with a catty comment of my own.

“Think black, think black,” my brain abruptly reprimands me. Yes of course, I forgot about the black.

Right then, my husband let’s out an ear-splitting snore. It’s as if he’s mocking me. Exasperated and now even stressed, I squeeze my eyes shut again.

Um, now I’m thirsty.

I try to ignore the thirst that has dried out my tongue as if I’ve been traveling under the desert sun for hours, but it’s no use. I sigh and get up for a glass of water because if I don’t, there’s really no way I can focus on thinking “black.”

Back in bed and now content, I can refocus on sleeping again.

It’s working! My brain is blank. I’ll soon be joining my husband, defeated, but not beaten yet! My breathing gets heavier and my brain lighter — just then, my bladder perks up and reminds me about the glass of water I just downed. It’s really a no-win situation.

I head to the bathroom and prepare to be defeated again the next night, and the next, and the next.

Follow Zahra on Twitter at @ZahraPeer.

Follow Women’s Post on Twitter at @WomensPost.

 

Calling it quits: Couple divorces after 77 years of marriage

When I think of Italian men, I think of some sultry, dark-haired, very sexy kind of guy. Remember Marcello Mastroianniin, La Dolce Vita, or Divorce Italian Style?  Very sexy, ci?

So, with this sexy image of love in Italy in my mind, imagine how surprised I was to read a short article with the headline “Italian couple seeking divorce after 77 years.”

Huh? It took them 77 years to figure out they weren’t happy? Or maybe he was fooling around, Mastroianni style? Or, or…what could possibly spur a couple to end a 77-year old marriage?

It turns out that jealousy was what put an end to their wedded bliss. When husband Antonio was poking around in wife Rosa’s private letters from when she was a young woman, he discovered a letter Rosa had written in the 1940s to the man who was her lover at that time. If I use all of my fingers and toes, I can figure out that this was an affair carried on while Rosa was married to Antonio. Gasp! This is a complete about-face from the tom-foolery attributed to a large percentage of Italian husbands. More gasps! It seems to be accepted and even promoted that many European men will have a long-term mistress during their marriage. Their wives choose to close their eyes about their husband’s dalliances and remain stoic throughout their marriage.

So, here we have Antonio aged 99 and Rosa aged 97 and she has been busted for an indiscretion in the 1940s, some 60 years ago. Surprisingly, Antonio made his discovery in 2002, a full 10 years before making a decision that he could no longer accept this affair in the long ago past.

To his credit, Antonio moved out of the conjugal home. But then, after only a few short weeks of protest, he moved back home. If Rosa was as confused as I am about Antonio’s protest, she’s made up for it in spades since Antonio moved back. Apparently the couple has been fighting for the last decade and now, enough is enough. On December 16, 2011 they filed for separation.

According to their lawyer, their case won’t be heard in court until March 2012. And once their case is heard, they’ll need to wait another three years of separation before a divorce can be granted. OK, 99 + 3 = …

You know, I understand that sometimes action is really needed. And I understand that sometimes a person really needs to take a stand.  Sometimes we can no longer abide some kind of affront, some kind of denigration, some kind of outrage.

But come on, Antonio, give it up, suck it up, move on. Enough already. Go back to living La Dolce Vita, okay?

This article was previously published on February 10, 2012.

Follow Marcia on Twitter at @Marcia222.

Follow Women’s Post on Twitter at @WomensPost.