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Best friends

I realized recently that Boyfriend is my best friend. I have many bests: there’s #BoyBestie and my Lemon, who I lovingly refer to as my heterosexual life partner; there’s Jen, Nus, Reg and Yaw and really too many amazing bests in my life to count; but the person who I call when I need someone, the person who I call when I want to share great news or moderately good news or just talk to about nothing and everything is Boyfriend. He’s my best friend.

I’m sure there’s a definition or a Thought Catalogue article somewhere that attempts to define what exactly a best friend is, something that uses big words or includes a list of the top bestie duos of all time; are you and best friend more like Monica and Rachel or Joey and Chandler or something along those lines. But for me it’s a little simpler and a lot less ‘90s.

Boyfriend is the only person who calls me a Wild Shannon because for some reason he thinks of me as a Pokemon. There’s literally no logic to this but it makes me laugh uncontrollably. He’s a terrible dancer but we have a dance move that no one else understands and sometimes we’ll do it at the same time. It’s embarrassing and only kind of adorable. We have shows that we watch and we never TV cheat, ever, no matter how hard Netflix makes it for us. We have our own language; we get each other, even if no one else really understands why we’re laughing or what it is we’re talking about.

When it comes down to it though Boyfriend is just the person I’d rather be with; hanging out and watching a movie with him is better than a night out with anyone else. I love my friends and I am so lucky to have them in my life but I had no idea what it felt like before this past (almost) year to be someone’s partner.

Boyfriend is my best friend and I had no idea it could all happen this quickly, I had no idea my life could change in so little time, but I can’t imagine a world where I don’t get random text messages that somehow light up my entire face even though most of the time they are just pictures of cats with silly comments.

What worries me most though are the what ifs. What if we break up? What will I do then? How will I handle that? I try not to think about it but every relationship before this ended; did they end so I could find Boyfriend or do relationships always end? And that’s the big difference between having best friends and being best friends with your boyfriend: My closest friends love me unconditionally, they don’t get to break up with me, but Boyfriend could if he wanted to.

So I’m hopeful, cautiously optimistic if you will. I’ve got nothing to worry about but the idea of losing someone who I love that much scares the hell out of me.

 

#TOpoli with Sarah Thomson, Adam Vaughan, Andy Byford, and Travis Myers (July 22, 2013)

#TOpoli explores politics, transit, city building, and more more in the city of Toronto with a digital edge and a constant eye on the #TOpoli hashtag while live on the air.

#TOpoli with Sarah Thomson, Monday July 22:
Sarah welcomes guests Councillor Adam Vaughan, TTC CEO Andy Byford, in-studio guest Women’s Post editor Travis Myers to discuss the future on development on Bathurst with or without a Walmart, issues of funding transit, LRTs versus subways in Scarborough, the Downtown Relief Line, and much more.

 

 

Follow Sarah on Twitter at @ThomsonTO and Travis at @TravMyers.

Date night

I’ve been on a lot of dates: with boys I liked; with boys I hoped would call and never did; with boys I was serious with; but I’ve never been on a double date, not really. The Big Ex didn’t want me around his friends because his relationship with me was somehow different from his relationship with his friends. In the end I realized that he was just never sure about ‘us’ and we stayed together for as long as we did because I was filler, I was the girl he dated before he met the girl he loved and he was the man I needed to be with so that I could appreciate what was coming.

So on Saturday night Boyfriend and I went for drinks and a movie with two of my friends, a lovely couple who glow with happiness in love in a way that probably would have made me a little sick when I was younger. No one can be that in love right? That’s movie love, heartbreaking, crazy, sick to your stomach, put a radio over your head in the middle of the night in love. But my friends have that and I look up to them because I hope that after a couple of years Boyfriend and I will be like that, crazy-happy and living in sin. My Catholic upbringing leads me to believe that living in sin would be awesome, like when you first move out on your own and realize that there are no rules and you can go to the store and buy candy at midnight, just because. I assume that is what living with your partner is like, please don’t correct me if I’m wrong.

I was a little nervous to try this double dating thing, being new to healthy and happy dating. I was worried that Boyfriend wouldn’t get along with my friends and I really wanted them to like him and like us together. I shouldn’t have been worried, they loved him. The best thing about being with Boyfriend is that when my friends see how happy we are together they immediately like him.

The only hiccup to an otherwise perfect evening was that when I was being fake angry with Boyfriend my friend pointed out that, “It’s not going to work. No one believes that you’re actually mad when you’re so clearly in love with each other.”  Since Boyfriend and I still haven’t said that very terrifying four-letter word, I was afraid that he would freak out, I was nervous that my feelings had been outed and he would start acting weird. He didn’t. Nothing changed, except that he knew he’d won this particular battle.

So we haven’t said the words yet. I’m pretty sure they are going to burst out of my mouth any day now, and it’s nice to know that everyone can see how in love we are. It’s a win for me at least… now I know I’m not crazy. Not completely anyway.

Win the Wrap Your Body Slim experience

This is your chance to win a great package from the fantastic health and wellness company Wrap Your Body Slim. One lucky winner will receive a basket filled with goodies such as a detox body wrap, facial wrap, a Vemma (vitamins, essential minerals, mangosteen & aloe) sample bottle, a Verve sugar free energy can, a Bod-e Burn can and a Thirst packette. Enter today for your chance to win the Wrap Your Body Slim experience.

Contest Rules & Regulations:
Contestants must reside in Canada (excluding Quebec) to be eligible to win
Contestants must be 18 or older
Contestants are eligible to enter 1x daily (further entries will not be counted)
Contest closes on Tuesday, August 13th, at 2 p.m.

 

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This might be the greatest Canadian YouTube video of all time

Backstreet’s Back circa 1999 Canada’s Wonderland

Words fail me when I think of ways to describe this. Masterpiece comes to mind. Genius. Art.

From the description of the video as told by uploader Ryan Doucette:

“So here’s the story… For those of you from Southern Ontario, it’s likely that you went to Canada’s Wonderland in Toronto during the late 90’s/early 2000’s in the Summertime. I have very fond memories of the roller coasters, waterpark and food at the amusement park. One year, I went with some friends and we came across the new video karaoke; essentially, you pay them some money and they create a blue screen video of you and your friends singing a song. They would broadcast the song, including the videos of whoever was singing at the time, on the outside of the building.They had all the hits at the time, including a number of songs by the Backstreet Boys. While I never had the guts to go in and sing something, we happened to be outside the place when this guy went in for his solo. The park staff were stunned, and my friends and I were on the ground crying with laughter! Needless to say, I wanted this video, and the staff were kind enough to oblige. I spent the rest of my spending money for the day on the VHS copy of his performance, and to this day, I still consider it money well spent. It’s been hiding in a box in my basement for years, and today, I converted it to digital. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you WTF Backstreet’s Back. Enjoy!”

While this man may not know the joy he has brought to this writer and other viewers of the video, he at least knows that he has a wicked kick and some sick moves.

Below are some of my favourie stills from the video.

 

You can follow Travis on Twitter at @TravMyers for all the latest in Backstreet Boys dance videos from over a decade ago.

Facebook official

Recently someone told me that Boyfriend and I aren’t officially official because we haven’t declared our undying love for each other via the Facebook relationship status. They were serious.

I was shocked, because I haven’t had a relationship status since the Big Ex and I broke up; my status says nothing. I’m not single, dating or complicated and I’m okay with that. Boyfriend and I have been together nearly a year and we’re happy but we’re not the kind of people who need to shout about how much we love each other on Facebook. Neither of us feel that our bond as a couple would somehow be stronger if we had matching profile pictures and constantly updated our friends on how incredibly in love we are.

Don’t get me wrong, I gush, I talk to my friends about how happy I am, if I could write a good sonnet I would probably do that too, but Facebook is the place where I share cool shit I find on the interwebs, not the adult version of a high school locker.

I share a lot of my life with the internet, but Boyfriend and I have an agreement: he doesn’t read my column and I don’t write about anything that I wouldn’t want to talk to him about, so if I’m super mad at him I have to tell him before I tell you lovely folks. It’s a fair deal.

But blogging and writing is so much different than an obnoxious status update. Instead of declaring your everlasting love with a grammatically incorrect and socially unacceptable update, maybe you could text your darling.

It’s okay to be excited about the person you’re seeing, it’s awesome actually, but if you have to shout it out to the world do you think that maybe you’re a little insecure in your relationship? In the same way that we forget to check our phones when we’re having a really great time, when you’re really happy do you even have time to tell the world how happy you are?

There are people who are always an exception to the rule. Two of my friends were in a long distance relationship until very recently and I thought the love notes they sent each other were adorable and sweet, they needed the internet because they didn’t always have each other.

So while I don’t have a relationship status I’m very much taken, very much in love and I have no plans to change that any time soon. However, I’m also not about to change my status so that everyone else knows that my relationship is real. The people who should know him know him and the people I love have met him and like him almost as much as I do.

The next time you see a status change from me it will be engaged or married, if I get my way and we elope on an island; anything less isn’t worth the effort or the hassle from people whom I haven’t seen in years congratulating me on no longer being a sad spinster lady.

CREEP: This guy gropes women while posing for photos

There is a joke online about the so-called “hover hand” — where men posing with women for photos won’t actually put their hand on their female companion’s shoulder but instead will let their hand hover just shy of a normal photo pose. Silly, yes. Most women would find it a bit funny that these guys are too shy to even put their hand on a shoulder.

This guy, however, is billed as “the opposite of the hover hand” for his flagrant disregard for boundaries as he shamelessly gropes women who he poses for photos with. This website applauds the guy for being a public perv.

Check out the series:

 

The women he is posing with are all in costumes, leading us to think they are either trade show models or at some sort of cosplay convention.

Are they inviting this kind of behaviour because they are dressed up in revealing costumes? the answer is, of course, no. In fact, if these women are trade show models they are bound and pressured to stay quiet and pose for the photos with this creep at the risk of losing their job by complaining. These women are hired to be dangled along with whatever is being promoted at the show, to complain because a patron went a step too far and groped them would probably get them in trouble or fired for shattering the illusion that they are hired to promote.

Creep factor: 100% — this guy is taking advantage of women who are incapable of fighting back.

Someone should also tell this guy that Jamiroquai called and he wants his fun-fur bucket hat back.

 

 

Follow Women’s Post on Twitter at @WomensPost.

Waterproof

Happy Tuesday! It’s the day after a record-breaking rainfall drenched Toronto, leaving commuters stuck in subway stations and stranded in vehicles all across the city. Peter Kimbell, a meteorologist at Environment Canada, confirms that this rainfall is ranked among the most intense rainfalls the city has ever experienced, with 90 mm of rain within 90 minutes. In total, 126 mm of rain fell at Pearson yesterday, with the original record of 121 mm being set by Hurricane Hazel in 1954.

What does that mean for Torontonians today? Twenty thousand people are still without power, concentrated mostly in the west end of the GTA; TTC and GO Train services have been impacted; and the clean-up will continue for those in the city with flooded basements and damaged property.

Short of putting your home up on stilts, there’s not a whole lot that can be done to completely flood-proof your home, but there are a lot of things that can be done to help reduce the damage of a flood like yesterday’s.

For one thing, I listen to the warnings. So much can be prevented if the warnings put out by Environment Canada are taken seriously and not brushed off until it’s too late to do anything about it. I always have this semi-irrational fear that ignoring a flood warning will leave me sloshing around soaked and stinky carpets and picking up the pieces of ruined furniture, electronics and family albums. And then, of course, there’s the mould. So I listen, I take them seriously and I do whatever I can do last minute to prepare.

I clear my gutters, drains, and downspouts. Okay, I get my husband to clear my gutters, drains, and downspouts. That’s totally the same thing.

We don’t have anything that needs it in our basement right now, but I always do a check to see if I’ve got any furniture, electronics or appliances that are in harm’s way, so that I can raise them onto concrete blocks.

I get my hands on some sandbags and I use them anywhere I expect water to be able to seep in.

None of these are major retrofits or impermeable solutions, but a couple dollars spent could be your defense against tens of thousands of dollars in major damage caused by flood damage, so I do what I can.

I’m sending a ton of well wishes and positive energy to all fellow Torontonians still dealing with the aftermath of yesterday’s rainfall.

LIVE TWEET: How to survive #StormTO on a VIA Train heading to Toronto

Our intrepid writer (and something of a lush if you go based on his tweets alone) Simon Johnson spent his evening on the VIA Train heading from Winsdor to Toronto. After a lovely weekend visiting with his boyfriend’s family he had to get home to relieve the dog-sitter and give his puppy Baxter some love.

Unfortunately for Simon, this Monday was a Monday like no other, when #StormTO hit and gave Toronto more rain than she has ever seen. The subway flooded, the highways flooded, Union Station flooded, and of course, the way home was flooded, thankfully not nearly as bad as the situation taking place on a GO Train not too far away.

Simon tweeted his way through this mess and, with a little help from some new friends on the train, we think he just might make it home okay, even if it is a little late. Read on below to see how Simon manages to turn a miserable stalled evening into a train party.

Stay up to date with Simon’s voyage here:

You can follow Travis on Twitter at @TravMyers and follow Simon at @ScottishGuy for the latest updates on flood train shenanigans.

What is Mayor Rob Ford doing while the city floods? Enjoying A/C in his car

 

With the city paralyzed, flooded, immobile, and soaked it should of course come as no surprise that Mayor Rob Ford is not at the nerve centre of the city doing what he can to get things up and running again. Rob Ford is with his family, without power, crammed into the SUV with the air conditioner on in an attempt to stay cool.

Our mayor’s number one priority in the middle of a weather crisis is his own comfort.

Of course Fordites would respond that ‘he has to look out for his family’ and ‘it is after 5 o’clock’ — but this flies in the face of the concept of being mayor of a major city.

Your job doesn’t end at 5 o’clock.

Your family, albeit without power, has a capable matriarch. This city, on the other hand, has no other head.

Rob Ford has, once again, abandoned not only his responsibility, but his city in a time of need.