By Shannon Hunter
This article was originally published on November 8, 2012.
We were going to talk, we were going to lay it all out and figure out where we stood. I swear we were. But we didn’t and I’m OK with that.
Sunday came and went and instead of forcing the awkward conversation I’m not sure I want to have we enjoyed ourselves. We went on one of those really great dates that starts in the early afternoon and bleeds into the next day. We went to the Designing 007 exhibit at the Lightbox, we had dinner and discussed the merits of unicorns versus Ninja Turtles, then we went to see Wreck-It Ralph and when I finally fell asleep in his arms none of the words I had wanted to say seemed to matter.
At first I was upset. I like to plan things and I follow through on those plans; I had our talk all laid out in my head, I was prepared for any outcome.
I thought that not having the “where is this going” chat would leave me full of uncertainty; I thought that I’d be a mess of a human being constantly questioning what we were doing, but I’m not.
Actions speak so much louder than words and talk or no talk I know that he’s mine. He holds my hand as we walk down the street, he takes the time to see me and unlike all those that came before he doesn’t leave me questioning his commitment to me. I feel safe with him.
Mr. Unexpected is not who I would pick for me but he’s right for me.
It has taken me a long time to realize what I need from the man in my life. I’ve put up with bad behaviour, I’ve made excuses for broken promises and worst of all I’ve let myself be an option rather than a priority.
Mr. Unexpected cares about me and he shows me almost every day. He doesn’t try and keep me at arm’s length, he doesn’t let me get away with being evasive and he accepts all of me whether that is the weird nerdy girl, the workaholic or the sex columnist he takes me exactly as I am.
While there are parts of me that still want to have that talk I think that his actions speak volumes, the problem wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk it was that he’s been saying it to me the whole time and I haven’t been paying attention. He surprised me on a Sunday with movies and an ice capp, he sat with me for a week while I was sick and trying desperately to feel better and he never made me feel like it was a chore.
Sometimes we spend so much time talking that we forget to listen to the people around us. Mr. Unexpected didn’t force the conversation on Sunday because we were having a blast together and there was no need to talk that out – we were already living it.